Ten Peeves that Dogs Have About Humans

'1'

Blaming your farts on me....

Not funny... Not funny at all !!!

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'2'

Yelling at me for barking.

I'M A FRIGGIN' DOG, YOU IDIOT!

 

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'3'

Taking me for a walk, then

Not letting me check stuff out.

Exactly whose walk is this anyway?

 

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'4'

Any trick that involves balancing

Food on my nose.

Stop it!

 

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'5'

Any haircut that involves bows or ribbons.

Now you know why we chew your stuff

Up when you're not home.

 

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'6'

The slight of hand, fake fetch throw.

You fooled a dog!

Whoooo Hoooooooo what

A proud moment for the top of the food chain.

 

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'7'

Taking me to the vet for "the big snip",

Then acting surprised when I freak

Out every time we go back!

 

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'8'

Getting upset when I sniff the crotches of your guests.

Sorry, but I haven't quite mastered that handshake thing yet.

 

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'9'

Dog sweaters.

Hello ???

Haven't you noticed the fur?

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'10'

How you act disgusted when I lick myself.

Look, we both knοw the truth.

You're just jealous.

 

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Now lay off me on some of these things.

We both know who's boss here!

You don't see me picking up your poop do you?

 

EVERY DOG HAS HIS DAY.

A DOG ALWAYS OFFERS UNCONDITIONAL LOVE.

CATS HAVE TO THINK ABOUT IT!